The Risky Path

Though The Risky Path is the name of our business, it definitely did not start out that way. Years ago, the risky path came into our lives as a way of living, being brave, walking in courage, and having faith when we feel uncertain. This is what it was then and what it still is to us today. When we decided to FINALLY, as everyone in our lives would say, start our own company working hand in hand together, everything about it felt like a risk! And to be honest. A HUGE RISK!

Sean would be walking away from a very lucrative corporate life as an executive and partnering with me to start with a humble beginning and new way of life. RISK was all he could see, and of course, his career has been all about how to mitigate risk. With almost 30 years in security, from the military to the cyber world, this was a big step. A step into the unknown, dark, and uncertainty with nothing but our faith to drive us forward. His passion for providing for and protecting our family felt in jeopardy. He struggled with all that he had known to venturing out into a new role, a new path, and one that wasn't as "secure". You mix that with his ever-growing calling to step outside of what he has always done and be who God has called him to be, and it definitely felt risky.

As far as me? Well, for the past 20 + years, along with my creative endeavors, raising children, and coaching young adults and families, I have struggled with anxiety brought on by health issues along with personal trauma. I have suffered at the hands of my own bad decisions, health scares, and well… just life. 

In 2010, my life took a turn where I had finally reached the end of myself and decided no more. I wanted and needed more for my life and from myself. I have been on a 14-year journey that has led to this moment. 

2017 was a mile marker year. Sean and I started traveling to Florida on and off for his job. We lived here for half of the year, going back and forth to our home in Georgia. It was then we fell in love with Florida and all it has to offer. Sunsets, the beach, entertainment, and ease of traffic (ATL is hell compared to here) it also offered time and the calling of freedom to us. We knew then that one day, we would be here.

While we were here it felt like all of our problems were a distant memory back home in GA. Kids, pets, house remodel, chores,.etc…. So we utilized every moment we could. We ate delicious food on the water, we spent time at the theater, walked the beaches, explored Disney for the first time and purchased season passes to Universal. Sorry folks we are Universal over Disney fans.

We went every time we were in town, sometimes multiple times. The next year, in 2018, Sean was very excited about October rolling around. Universal does Halloween Horror Nights, and he was pumped! Me? Not so much. The last “haunted house” I had ever done was built for elementary kids and I was in the 4th grade. Let’s just say it was my first and last experience with haunted houses, and I swore never to partake again. No reason for it; it scared me to death, and since anxiety had entered my life in a very visceral way in my 20s, leading to full-blown panic attacks that lasted for 4-6 hours, I was not interested in triggering that.

 Anxiety is different for everyone. We may share some similarities, but I do not pretend that what I experience is the same as someone else and vice versa, so if my experience isn’t the same as yours, that’s ok… and truthfully, I hope it isn’t because I wish it on no one. But when anxiety entered my life long ago, it fundamentally changed me, how I think, how I react, and how I maneuver life. I question everything I do, from what I eat to where I go, traveling, excursions, literally everything. Now, I am not afraid to DO anything, but I was afraid of having a panic attack, so… if at any given moment something that we were doing or going to do might make me feel like one would or could be triggered, I tend to veer away. At least most of the time, and some of the time, I fight through it. This has just become a completely normal 100% autopilot habit for me. I don’t think twice about it.

When Sean started traveling to Florida and wanted me to go with him even that was a concern for me. So when we first got here in and he wanted to venture out and about going to concerts in a new place I had never been, getting on dolphin boat cruises in the ocean, to Bioluminescent tours in the middle of the night at Cape Canaveral in alligator infested waters you can imagine how my mind was screaming at me to run for the hills.

It was then, though, that I knew something had to change. I was so tired of living my life in fear of something I had zero control of. I had no idea when a panic attack would happen or why, but I was living to avoid it with no data on how I could even do that.  So, I made up my mind. I \ wanted to do all the things. They sounded terrific, and despite the anxiety, I do have a strong heart for adventure. So one day, when we were discussing going on a bioluminescent tour, I was hem-hawing about it. He kept reassuring me that I would be fine. This is also something I have always wanted to do, and I was feeling so torn. I did not want to give up the opportunity! So I looked up at him and said, "ok, let's do it! I'm going to take the Risky Path!"… Sean laughed at me and said, "What?" I said, "The risky path. From now on, when I make decisions, I am going to base them on whether or not they are the risky path versus the safe, comfortable path." See I have learned that every time I choose comfy and safe I miss out, lose out and live in regret. So, with Florida in our grasp, I chose the risky path. He was very excited about this and was all in, holding me accountable for my word.

Now, it may sound like I took a strong stance and did it with ease, but I assure you I did not. As soon as I said it, my thoughts came flooding in, like, “Why in the hell did you say that? What even is that? The Risky path? You know risk means danger, right Heather? What are you doing?”  Truthfully i didn’t know what I was doing but I learned it was the best thing I ever did. Every time a decision to do something came up and I was like umm i don't know about that Sean would ask me "well what is the risky path?" "Ugh…." Ok, well, if that’s the case, it makes the answer easy. Until….

Until the day we went to Universal unknowingly on Halloween Horror Nights opening weekend. We were already in the park. We had free tickets due to our season passes. There was NO reason not to stay except for me. Oh, how I wanted to run, but oh yeah! The risky path! So we stayed. Oh, and did I mention I have a phobia of clowns? And, oh yeah, one of the exhibits that year was Killer Clowns… What? How is that even possible? How is this my luck? Let me tell you that night was something to be contended with in my life history book, rivaled by only a few. I walked into every single haunted house that night. I ran with the Killer Clowns, and we selfied together. I stood alone in the middle of Diagon Alley with not one soul in sight except my husband. I reprimanded every single person who jumped out and tried to scare me like the "MOM" I am, and I had one of the best nights of my life. 

God has a very funny way of walking you through your trials and seeing you out on the other side of them. He showed me that I had faith that could be exercised, that not everything meant to scare, fool, or trap me was meant for me, he taught me that my anxiety did not control me as much I didn’t control it. He taught me that stepping out in darkness, into the unknown, into uncertainty may be terrifying but also the most liberating thing one can do. It offers faith, trust, and freedom on the other side.

Believe me, I never would have thought that haunted houses and killer clowns would set me on a path to inner growth and healing, but they did. They showed me that choosing the risky path was choosing life and choosing it more abundantly. It showed me that I could.

So when Sean and I started out on this new venture together, we searched for the right name for a while, and nothing fit… One night, we were feeling the unknown and uncertainty of it all, and I laughed and jokingly said, "We should name it The Risky Path…"